Personalizing a Funeral Service
A Funeral can and should be as unique as the life that is being celebrated. Don't feel that you have to have a cookie cutter type of service or that your ideas for a special ceremony are foolish.
You shouldn't feel pressured or rushed into making a decision. We want to help you make the arrangements that you want.
Personalizing a funeral or memorial service can be very therapeutic - it gives you and your family something to concentrate on as you relive memories. It's also welcomed by family and friends attending a visitation or service because it gets them involved and provides a topic of conversation when they might otherwise not know what to say.
We offer many ways to personalize a service.
Ask questions and make suggestions; we want to assist you in any way we can to ensure that your loved one is memorialized in a meaningful way.
Value of Funeral Services
The purpose of a funeral is to provide a way of commemorating a life and drawing together friends and family members so that they can support each other as they share memories. Although different religious communities have created set formats or rituals that they follow in conducting funeral services, there is no right or wrong way to do a funeral.
The most important thing to keep in mind when creating a service or commemoration is that it should be reflective of the person who has passed and their wishes should be taken into account. While religious elements may play a part, it should include stories about the person's life that help everyone recapture and revisit their own memories. Sometimes this is best accomplished by having friends or family members share their reflections as part of the service. Some people personalize the service with special music (which my be religious or non-religious). Others bring in pictures to have at the service. Sometimes favorite things that belonged to the deceased are integrated into the
ceremony such as wood carvings, golf clubs or even a motor cycle.
The goal is to give a true sense of who this person was. There is nothing wrong with telling funny stories about the person who died: a funeral recognizes the sad event of a death, but can include humor.
Whether or not an open casket is part of the ceremony is an individual family choice. The main reason that we have any "viewing", is because that allows people to have a physical presence to focus on when saying their goodbyes. Since most people are very visually inclined by nature, it seems to help them to see the person for the death to be "real" to them and allows them to better focus to begin to tidy up the loose ends that they have with this person. A funeral helps people begin to complete their relationship with the person who died, and sometimes seeing the body helps.
The value of the service depends on how it is constructed. Our family attempts to create funerals that leave families and friends feeling very lucky that the deceased was a part of their lives; the music, the stories, the whole nature of the person being well integrated into the service that it captures just who they were.